If I never have to take the kids to a restaurant alone again it will be too soon.
Ever since having my second child I have had anxiety taking them both anywhere alone. I have gone to the grocery store enough times to know even if they act up I can make it through the trip without them killing me. But, being a working mother taking them to the grocery store alone is about the extent of my adventures by myself.
Yesterday was my first official day as SAHM or WAHM (even though there will be no work until August).
In honor of me staying home my friend invited us for lunch...at a restaurant. She is pregnant with her second child (her first is a girl). I sort of poked fun of myself and asked if she was sure she wanted us to join her since my kids can get a little rowdy. I think she thought I was joking entirely. I was only half joking since the bat shit crazy only happens about 30% of the time.
It was peaceful while we waited for our food and I got cocky. Huh, wonder what I was so nervous about, I thought to myself, the kids are doing great. About 30 seconds after I had those thoughts things took a turn. But, see the turn is gradual and I had my blinders on and didn't recognize that I should have taken drastic measures. Kyan started his shenanigans by doing a little scoot, which at first glance seems harmless. Eventually the scoot turned into full fledged running around the table and ended in my holding both of my kids and my friend looking on with terror in her eyes.
As we are getting up to leave I tell Aspen that we should go and get her a balloon since she listened. Kyan turns, heads back to the table and begins shoveling his food in his mouth and sitting at the table like the normal child I know in hopes of rectifying his shot at a balloon. I sat in that booth defeated and embarrassed. Defeated because I know what the signs are but chose to ignore them and embarrassed because someone I know watched the kids get the better of me on my first day.
Man, first days can be rough in any job.
30 comments:
I remember being scared to take both kids anywhere alone for a long time after Ian was born. But like the saying goes Practice Makes Perfect so hang in there.
aww - don't you just love them!!
They make us crazy!!
Glad to know my kids aren't the only ones! LOL! It does take practice. You will get the 'angry eyes' glare down in no time!
I didn't have a choice when my kids were little. I did everything alone, and I was totally outnumbered 4 to 1. It's pretty amazing that I didn't actually hurt them.
We NEVER take both of my children out to eat. My yougest ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS makes a scene.
I try very hard NOT to take all 3 of mine out to eat. We eat alot of take out.
Don't worry - it gets easier and better, I promise. Some days are definitely hard, but the more you do it, the more your kids know what the expectations are when you go out somewhere. We still have HORRIBLE experiences but for the most part they know what to expect, how to behave, and what will happen to them if they screw up!!!! :-)
I remember distinctly our first crazy ass kids running around meal...it was at a Pizza Hut in North Carolina, just off post. I was about to pop with #3 and #2 was running around the table with me too tired to reign him in and #1 decides to 'help' and the chase ensued and ...I gave up going out for a LONG time. I'm glad my kids aren't the only ones that go NUTS but I soooo resent the people with docile little children who don't. They just don't get the value of a quiet meal out. I will say... my bag of tricks keeps them 'mostly' happy these days and we have more good than bad. I think I see the light!
That is rough! You deserve and award for making it thru. :)
You do know that kids can smell fear...AND inner peace...Never let them sense the fear...
Remember it gets better and better each time you go. I use to take four out with me, that was a feat in its self. Now that they are older 14 to 20, it is just sooooo enjoyable to go out for dinner. Its hard to remember the bad dinners and lunches out. Hang in there, you can do it. (Janes Blog)
Dinner out is MUCH better now that my children are teenagers...that is, if they don't decide to argue or insult each other. This is common for us, btw. And they get better about getting the best of you as they get older. Aaah!
Dear Zimk and Ace: Do you have any idea the problems you caused in our restaurant today? Your picture has been posted at our cash register and hostess station and you may not return with out two adults to supervise each one of your children.
A video of your children's behavior has also been sent to Planned Parenthood for their new advertising campaign.
Sincerely, Management
Candid Carrie is cracking my ass up so much I don't even remember my witty comment...
MaMa Deerest ... your ass was cracked long before you met me!
Thanks for stopping by my blog! I will be back here myself!
You're killing me, Candid Carrie!
Things will get better Kandace. Unfortunately you're just going to have to take your kids out to eat a lot so that you can get used to it. My husband is the same way: he rarely takes her alone anywhere, and it's usually just to the grocery store. Eventually you'll be deaf to all but the 30% bat shit crazy times :) (That's such a funny expression.)
Oh don't be so hard on yourself!! It happens to everyone...well not ME per se...but everyone else.
This too shall pass. Order in for while.
Hang in there, I have 3... some meals are good- some, not so much! I have realized that the more stressed I am the worse it gets-- though I have NOT figured out how to stay calm, cool and collected. My hubby is much better at that.
I do have a pretty good "stink eye" goin' though-- all 3 of them at least realize they are making me crazy- though they do not always choose to change their behavior.
I agree it gets better the more often you go out.
I am always happily surprised when they do behave-- and I make it a point to tell them how much I appreciate it!
We didn't take our kids out to a reg. restaurant until they were old enough to understand to sit quiet. When they were little I used to take them to Mac Donalds etc. If they ran around it was a kids place.
Don't remember how I just happened to find your blog but I'm glad I did. I can SO relate to the restaurant embarrassments...only your 2 sound like angels in comparison to my motley crew. I do take them out.....not often because it costs a small fortune but when I do, I'm usually embarrassed at least 10 times. Needless to say, I tend to tune out a lot of what they do. I think it's a sanity saving technique.
I just started taking my DD out again and she's 8 now...for the longest time I figured why torture myself? If I can't enjoy the meal and a glass of wine, then I'll stay in!
How were the thunderstorms and lightening over at your place. It was a light show here!!!
Hi,
Read my post tomorrow there is a surprise there for you!
Lee
Hang in there, momma!! You're doing a great job! Happy Fourth of July!
Well, I am glad you went. The kids need to get out even though it is tough on you for now. If you don't take them...they will ever learn. Start with small rules when going out and just keep adding on to them.
Try going ot to eat with Insane Mama...now that can be tough
First days suck. You'll be great it, I just know it. Plus, your kids have like the coolest names ever.
What gets me is you know they can behave well, they are just choosing not to. I prefer a little pinch under the table with the evil eye, or a threatened trip to the restroom!
Just remember that your kids are normal! Your friend will see that once her 2nd is born. It took me awhile to feel comfortable taking my 2 BOYS out places...they are a handful. I eventually learned to not let stuff like that bother me. As long as they are keeping their play at a low volume then and not crawling under the table or ON the table then we are good lol
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